Song Lyric Saturday with Ariana Grande

I’ve known about Ariana Grande since her days on “Sam and Cat” because my kids watched it. I thought her voice was super annoying but I loved her (then) red hair.

After that show was over, she got into music, but I wasn’t into that either. I like her personality a lot better- she’s very outspoken. I follow her twitter and Instagram. She has a pet pig (Piggie Smalls!) and a few dogs. If you say or do something that she is not pleased with, she will let you have it. Recently, she slammed Piers Morgan because he was rude to her mom.

Bad move. This guy’s been going at famous people, like the model Tess Holiday, and she flattened him as soon as she read his tweets. Ariana went at him immediately and it wasn’t pretty.

She’s had a pretty rough time in the last year or so- the bombing at her concert in England, then the death of Mac Miller. I read her tribute to him and cried.

I understood what she meant by saying he had demons he never deserved and that she hoped he would rest. Jake never deserved the demons he had, not for a minute of the years he battled bipolar disorder. I hope every day that he has found the peace that he couldn’t find here.

She also said that she wished that she could have taken his pain away. Same, Ariana, same. I would have done anything to take away Jake’s pain. I hope he knew that. I’m hoping she takes some time to take care of herself, because it would be good for her.

Her new album, “Sweetener” came out, and I think I might actually like it. I’ve liked a few of her songs here and there. I loved her collab with Nicki Minaj on “Bed”- I highly recommend listening to that. Can’t pick a lyric out of that one.

“Breathin” is good.

“I know I gotta keep

Keep on breathing”

Simple as that. If nothing else, I have to keep breathing. Sometimes my anxiety gets so bad, it’s hard to catch a breath. When the days are bad, I barely want to move. My mind is blank. If I can breathe, I can keep going, even if I’m moving like a snail. As long as I am moving and breathing, that is what matters, right?

Picture courtesy of Pinterest

Song Lyric Saturday with Joan Jett

Joan Jett is an original badass of rock and I love her.

“I don’t give a damn about my bad reputation” – “Bad Reputation”

I think that sums up why I like her so much. She had this attitude of “IDGAF if you like me or not and I care even less about what you think about me.”

Preach, Joan.

“I don’t really care if you think I’m strange/ I’m never gonna change”

That’s my entire personality in a song lyric. I’ve always been a bit different from almost everyone I know and I’m not planning on changing that anytime soon. Why should I? I like who I am.

Pic courtesy of Pinterest

Song Lyric Saturday with Katy Perry

Katy Perry is an interesting singer. I didn’t like her at first, like some other singers I have discussed on Song Lyric Saturday. I thought she was a little too peppy and over the top. Over time, her music has changed a little and so has my opinion of her. As we all know, I’m a huge Swiftie, so when things weren’t that great between her and Taylor, I was on Taylor’s side all the way.

I’m 35, but give me some space here.

I loved the collab with Kanye in “E.T.” and that was almost my pick, but the lyrics I wanted to use weren’t exactly blog-friendly.

Instead, I give you some lyrics from “Wide Awake” to ponder.

“Thunder rumbling

Castles crumbling

I am trying to hold on

God knows that I tried

Seeing the bright side

But I’m not blind anymore

I’m wide awake”

There comes a time in which things fall completely apart, and you just can’t deny it anymore. You want to keep holding on because you’re scared to move on, scared of what might be coming next. It just becomes too exhausting to try to keep holding on. However, you wake up and realize no matter what might be coming next, you have to let go. It’s time.

I was in that place once with my marriage. It’s not a good spot- I tried everything I could but yet nothing worked. My days were dark except for work and my kids. I eventually woke up and realized it was time to leave. I just couldn’t do it anymore- but I was scared. How would I do things alone with three kids?

Over time, I stopped caring. I just wanted out. I never did find all this out, because Jake died a week before I met with my lawyer to file. Therapy helped me decide to stay in my marriage- only because my husband decided to change his ways. It’s a decision that I am glad I made.

Picture courtesy of Pinterest

Song Lyric Saturday with Michelle Branch

Michelle Branch was big for a while on her own, went country for a while with The Wreckers and disappeared. I was disappointed- I loved her music. I even liked the music she made with The Wreckers. She’s now on her second marriage and just had a second baby, a boy. Congrats to Michelle and her husband. (She has a daughter, Owen, from her first marriage.)

This was another hard choice for me, but I chose “All You Wanted”. It was one of her first singles and I loved the video. Michelle has a great voice, and I would love to see her make a comeback. I know that would be difficult these days- once you leave the music scene, that’s pretty much it.

“If you want to

I can save you

I can take you away from here

So lonely inside

So busy out there

All you wanted was somebody who cared”

This song stayed on repeat once I bought the CD (yes, the CD, this was the time before downloads became huge). I thought that trying to save someone was a romantic thing because it is something you just do. I don’t think that anymore- because you can’t save everyone that you come across.

I learned this professionally- as an addiction counselor, I worked with opiate addicts. I lost a few on my caseload due to overdose, other medical issues and one in a car wreck. The overdoses were much harder to deal with- but my supervisor (a complete saint, if you ask me) told me more than once, “Wrae, you can’t save them all. You did the best you could to help.” Looking back, Mark was absolutely right. Many doctors, nurses and other medical professionals probably feel the same in some situations.

In a personal sense, sometimes people, myself, included, bury the things that hurt the most. I have to work on this and remind myself to reach out if I need to talk, or if someone has hurt me, to let them know. Everyone wants someone who cares and deserves just that.

Picture courtesy of pinterest

Song Lyric Saturday with Fiona Apple

**Trigger Warning: sexual assault is briefly mentioned in this post.**

I saw Fiona Apple live years ago with my best friends, Ashley and Tyson. I’d share pictures, but I don’t think they are exactly blog-appropriate. I’ll leave it at that it was a very fun night and as usual, we had a few adventures that still make us laugh hysterically. We have been friends for many years (Tyson and I have known each other since elementary school) so this just adds to the comedy.

Fiona came onto the music scene in the late 1990s with her first album and many were like “Whoa, what is that?” I was one of many who thought that way. She has a low-pitched voice that makes you want to hear more, and I definitely wanted more. Tyson plays the piano very well, and he was wide-eyed at the concert. Ashley loved both aspects, so we were delighted at the concert.

Fiona Apple

I chose “Criminal” after some serious debate.

“I gotta cleanse myself of all these lies until I’m good enough for him”

That is some realness. Fiona was sexually assaulted at 12, and I can’t imagine the pain that causes, emotionally and physically. I’ve read that her music was an outlet for her afterward. Sometimes you feel so wretched, so dirty after something that awful, you have to clean yourself inside and out until you feel okay for someone to like or love you.

I can’t really speak for Fiona, but that’s the way I interpret it. In my own case, I had to confess everything that I did with Jake to Matthew and that was one of the worst conversations I’ve ever had. Tears were everywhere and it was awful. It took a long time before I could feel like I was good enough for him again. As my former therapist said, I’m still a good person- I did something that wasn’t good.

I’ve been able to make up for this in every way that I can- I would never cheat again.