Happy Birthday, Shortstack Blogs!

One year ago, I created a blog. I had no idea if I would stick with it, or just write a few posts and let it fade. I love to write and I’ve always wanted to do something big with it so here I am.

Zoo day with Julian and Lily

Progress Report #2

I haven’t made a penny from this blog. I haven’t gone self-hosted. Why? I’m focused mainly on getting views and loyal readers. I’d rather have that right now. I’d like to know people are reading my work than make money and not have people care.

I write about heavy topics. I know my writing voice is not for everyone and I’m totally okay with that. I’m not for everyone. I do think about my audience when I’m writing. I do appreciate the comments. It hasn’t been easy to build my audience- like most writers, I struggle with confidence. I almost trashed a few posts but put them up anyway. Weirdly enough, those have been some of my best-read posts.

My stats are going up- one month, I hit almost 1200 views. I’m at over 500 likes on Facebook and almost 900 on Instagram. This is growth. I’ve slowed on my guest posting due to the kids being on summer break. The memes I post are no joke- it’s been an interesting summer. I do plan to get back to outside projects once they go back to school- the cats are much quieter. They are great writing mascots.

Miss Purr.. sleeping as usual

My posts have gotten longer and more in depth. This is thanks to research, growth in my writing skills and lots of thought. I try to give lots of info without being boring. I’ve been working on my graphics to make those more eye-catching- people like that.

I do have goals- I set new ones every three months. They include posting to mom blog sites once a month, working on a secret project, a course with Savannah from Millennial Mrs. and Mom, along with other things.

I didn’t realize how far my talents go until I started being approached by other bloggers to collaborate on projects. Wow. Me?

My Blog Is a Toddler

I have a one year old blog. It can’t walk or talk but I’m sure WordPress can throw tantrums. I started this blog as a way of helping others- mental health and suicide prevention and awareness. The parenting part… obviously I have a lot to say there, because this is not easy.

I wish so much I didn’t feel the need to write about suicide. There is a heaviness, a hole in my heart that will never be fixed. I write about it so that others know they are not alone. Grief is a horrible thing- losing someone to suicide is something that is difficult to put into words.

I write so that hopefully others think again- I lost a few that didn’t. I write so that people have information to pass along to others if they need it. If one person thinks again, or my mental health related posts help in any way, then I have fulfilled my purpose. I think Jake would be proud of me- he always encouraged me to do what makes me happy.

September 1 is coming quickly and there will be a very special post on September 4.

There’s more to come this year. Thanks so much for reading my blog. I appreciate it more than you realize.

The words I will never forget #lifelessonsfromjake

What You Won’t Do..Or So You Think (As a Parent)

This post was inspired by a Facebook comment discussion with Matthew’s cousin Alexis. We were discussing the things we never thought we would do or see as parents, but here we are… Alexis has four kids (two are hers, two are her husband’s from a previous relationship) under 8, so she stays busy. Her brother’s (now ex) girlfriend is pregnant with their first son and doesn’t quite know the adventures of parenting- she apparently thinks she will never see a blow-out.

*evil Mommy laugh* Oh, Jessica, are you in for a rude awakening. October is gonna be a very interesting month for you.

Sibling Wars

Raise your hand if you have more than one kid and you envisioned that they would never fight and get along at all times. I’ll wait.

*tick tock…tick…tock…*

Exactly. My sons are almost ready to qualify for WWE wrestling spots. Julian has a great headbutt (I know this, he almost broke my nose once). I’ve heard thuds and screams that would stop a non-seasoned mom’s heart. Me? I just make sure they’re still in one piece. It’s not like they have breakables in their room. They randomly walk up on each other and poke them.. disturbing their calm. Anyone else? It’s like they can’t live happily knowing the other is peaceful.

All the shade goes to mom

I did not envision the amount of snark and shade that would enter this house or my response to it. When you are sarcastic and have sarcastic/snarky kids… things get interesting.

The mini-queen of shade (because I am the reigning queen of shade in this house) is Lily. She’s not tiny but the shade is real. So are her eye rolls, door slamming skills, and stomps. The pre-teen years are here and not going anywhere.

I hear it only gets worse, so someone send me an endless supply of Cherry Coke and chocolate. Thanks. I’ve been told I am “the meanest mom ever”. “I don’t even like you”, “I never liked you anyway”, you know, all that fun stuff. But then, at the end of the day, Lily wants to hang out with me so I guess she might like me after all.

What’s cleaning?

When I imagined motherhood, I imagined a cleaner house than I currently have. I also didn’t imagine a daughter that is super messy. The boys team up and clean their room in less than a half hour. Lily takes days. She cries and pouts her way through it and just… no. It has taken me two hours to do it before and then I can’t move the rest of the day. We are re-doing their room this summer- the boys are getting new beds, and both the kids’ rooms are getting re-painted. This means a huge cleanout. Again, Cherry Coke please. I slightly obsess over my kitchen counters being clean (they’re gross at the moment) and the floor is never clean, but we have much more fun doing other things anyway.

When Lily goes to college, I’ll be 43. Unless my RA has progressed terribly, I will still have the energy to clean the house. If it has, I’ll hire someone and be done with it. Until then? I can forget a spotless house. I attempted this when the kids were smaller and nobody was happy. These days, well, the kids help and this is good.

Arguing about coats

Fall and winter are great around Kentucky until you mention jackets and coats. Ugh. I have to almost shove the boys into them. Lily ends up looking like Ricky from “A Christmas Story” from October-March. Julian hates bulky coats because of his sensory issues and Cameron loves the cold like Matthew so you can see the issues I face. Both boys end up with polar fleece jackets. I can forget gloves unless it snows but luckily they like hats. Cameron lived in a Seahawks toboggan for two winters.

Getting them to wear jackets is a process. I have to tell them what the temperature is in the morning and what it probably will be when they get home because otherwise they will take their jackets off. I’m not kidding. Cameron took off his jacket on the bus one day and proceeded to try to walk home when it was 35 degrees out. I stopped that idea as soon as I saw him. I never thought I would argue with a kid over wearing coats and weather, but every fall and winter, here we are.

A friend in Maryland has the same issue. Ironically, she also has a Cameron.

Me? I bundle up as soon as it hits 40 degrees. I hate cold weather.

Kids change your priorities

I never saw myself as the helicopter mom, because I just don’t have it in me for all that. I figured I’d be watchful but not too overbearing.

Then I had three kids.

Like every other parent on the planet, I have two ears, eyes and hands.

I used to intervene with the kids’ battles, but.. jeez, they’re pre-teens and it’s called problem solving. They learn this at school and can apply it in real life at home. It drains my brain and patience. Kim Bongiorno knows my life. Now, I’m just like, “Y’all have about three minutes to figure this out, because I’m not listening to it all day.”

Who wants to hear kids fighting all day? I most certainly do not. My kids are too loud for all that and I’ve only got so many migraine meds.

Parenting will make you do a LOT of things that you don’t envision before. Some are hilarious, some aren’t. May the parenting force be with all of us for the rest of summer vacation.

Pics are courtesy of Pinterest

Monday’s Got Jokes

Monday AGAIN?

*sighs*

And it’s summer vacation?

*reaches for Pepsi before opening eyes*

Mornings are kinda stupid. I’m not a fan. I don’t like worms either.

Sums up my life on most Mondays. I’ve never seen my cats like this.

I have a hard time getting out of bed. I need a lot of motivation. My phone doesn’t have this because I have an Android but if it did…

This will apply very well over summer vacation. There might be a couple of long weeks.

Grumpy Cat gets me. I would punch some Mondays in the face. Hard.

Have a few laughs and a good week!

Summertime With Kids: Ideas for Fun

It’s Here…Summer Vacation

That magical time is upon us- summer vacation. My kids are in their last full week of school-this means last minute field trips and award ceremonies. School is out on May 31, and that means until August 15, these kids are all mine.

Yikes.

That also means I get to keep them from mauling each other.

How will that get accomplished?

Food, wifi, and sleep. I plan on letting them sleep until 10 AM (cut off time for the boys’ meds) and going from there. I’m not one of those super scheduler moms, and if you’re one of those- wow. I don’t know how you even begin to do it. I just don’t have the brain capacity.

Besides those three things, I have plans for fun things that I’m going to share so that maybe you, too, can keep your kids from mauling each other. The parenting struggle is real for all of us, right?

The Plan

We live in the suburbs of Louisville, KY. This means we are about a half hour from a lot of activities. I’m going for free or cheap because there’s three of them and one of me. Cameron is 13 so 12 and under prices really don’t work for him anymore and after this summer, Julian won’t qualify for them either. He will turn 12 on July 18, a fact that shatters my soul. I also like to stay within that half hour of home because of gas prices- they just hit $3. I don’t plan on going out everyday because Julian gets overwhelmed by that and I get tired out pretty easily. We tried for 2-3 days a week last year and that worked out pretty well.

Petting Zoo- Right at the half hour drive limit, there is this great petting zoo called Henry’s Ark. All three kids love it, and it’s free. We try to go twice a month when it’s not too terribly hot, because the animals tend to hide when it is. One year, I learned that peacocks do make noise, and it’s one of the most horrifying things I have ever heard. Most kids like petting zoos, so this is a win for everyone.

Parks- Bigger win if it has a splash pad. The park closest to us is really new and has a huge splash pad. We take snacks and drinks- it’s almost a whole afternoon outing. There is also a 120 step silo at this park and we love walking to the top because you can see pretty far from there. Parks are free and you can stay there all day long. Don’t forget sunscreen.

Mini-golf- If you can catch a deal, this isn’t a bad way to spend an afternoon. There is a course a few miles from home and I am waiting to catch a deal. Like many kids, my kids are competitive and love mini golf. This can be a lot of fun.

Movies- A lot of movie theaters are running specials throughout the summer. Some are free, some are $1 each. Most run at 9 or 10 am. You can find these by using Google “free summer kid movies” or “cheap summer kid movies”. The kids and I saw “Angry Birds” and a couple other movies this way last year. We plan on doing this again. Why not?

Library programs- Most libraries offer reading programs. Louisville’s also offers a cultural pass, which is free admission for a kid (each kid has to get their own) and an adult to get into places throughout the city on certain days throughout the summer. I think Cameron will do the teen reading program, but I know Julian won’t touch the kid one. Lily will for sure. I’m getting cultural passes for all three kids, and we can get into the Zoo, the Science Center, and other places for free. We loved it last year.

Chores- This is the summer of the cleanout and redoing of the kids’ rooms. They just don’t know it yet *evil mom laugh*. Their rooms need repainting and the boys are ready to get rid of the bunk beds. This means major cleaning, and Lily’s room- well, it needs a makeover. Perfect timing, right? It isn’t fun, but we have all the time on the planet.

Old-school fun- washing my car, water-balloon fights, slip and slides, sidewalk chalk, playing tag, the fun stuff! We have gotten a slip and slide every summer for years and everyone loves it. There’s a huge collection of sidewalk chalk in our garage. I think they are old enough to learn how to wash a car.

Art things- Paint rocks, coloring, etc. I’ve been wanting to paint rocks and I think the kids may enjoy it. They like to color so this can be a fun activity.

Friends/Family Time- The kids want to hang out with their friends over the summer and I am okay with this. (Quiet time for Mom? YES PLEASE!) They also have cousins close in age to them that they see a lot, so this means more hanging out time. Julian’s birthday party is always a fun summer event. Last year we had a dunk tank so I’m not sure what this year’s party will contain.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST…..A FAMILY TRIP TO DAYTONA BEACH. Is Daytona ready for us?

What are your plans for summer vacation with the kids?

All pics courtesy of Unsplash

Back to school, kids!

It’s 2 PM on the last day of summer vacation and where are the kids?

With their grandmother at the pool.

I would have had them ready at dawn had she asked, but I wasn’t that lucky.

Mom’s First Summer at Home

This was the first summer that I have EVER been at home with them full time because I have been working on my life coaching business, and my Program Assistant position is mainly weekends. I think the kids sensed this and ran with it.

We have gone to a petting zoo, an indoor trampoline park, a nearby park or two, and other fun places. For the most part, we just hung out at home with our pets and friends. For those of you who haven’t heard about the zoo that we have, that includes a dog (Tiger), two cats (Tails and Miss Purr), a turtle (Lightning) and a rabbit (Bugs). That takes a lot of maintenance. I guess that means they learned a bit of responsibility.

Julian turned 11 and according to his checkup, he finally hit 71 lbs. If you have a kid on any kind of ADHD meds, you can imagine my happiness at this. He’s 4’6″ so he’s going to be on the small side for a 6th grader, but he does not care and I pity the first bully that tries him, because they will most likely be the last. He’s small, but he’s a fighter. He’s pretty small, and has a great headbutt. I know this, because he almost broke my nose once when he was smaller. Nose X-rays are the WORST.

Lily has outgrown Julian and so the twin question has FINALLY stopped. (Julian is 18 months older, and Cameron is 18 months older than him, so I’ve never really understood that question, but people are weird.) She’s ready for fourth grade and so am I. Her bedroom door has been a trooper this summer, because it’s been slammed more times than I can count. It’s ready for a break.

Naptime is OVER

Cameron has enjoyed his many extra hours of sleep. In fact, he slept until after 11 this morning. He wasn’t ready when his grandmother showed up but she has patience that I will not possess in my next two lifetimes. They left after he went through three shirts and 15 minutes of looking for his swim trunks. The irony is I had told him JUST TEN MINUTES BEFORE that he needed to get moving just in case she got there early, but what do I know, right? I’m just Mom.

I will be delighted to wake up at 6 AM tomorrow with the boys to send them off to school. I went over where to go at school with both boys, bags are packed and uniforms are ready. A small part of me is worried that Julian will have some sort of shutdown, but I hope he doesn’t. He tends to do this when he is worried or scared. I have faith in the kid.

For the first time since preschool, Lily will get back to school pics by herself because her brothers have left her for middle school. I see a diva shoot coming.

After the kids are gone, it’s a quiet breakfast with Matthew to celebrate 🙂

Don’t get me wrong, I love these kids, but it’s time to learn.